Event Announcement; Contract Auction!

We’ve been training our youngest recruit for a while now. You might know him, his name is John Egbert. Here take my business card, you can put your bid on the back with your name and number. If you win, well you can have him however you want. 

[[This is just a little thing we were planning to do anyway. Throw your idea in our ask box of a creative thing you would like good old John Egbert to do. We’ll pick one to draw!

We’ll be fitting it into an auction theme as well as beginning our story line a bit more. As always thank you for following and drop a message in our askbox!]] 

Jade: Perks of the job.

[[A little something to tide you over. We’re working on some ideas so just hang tight.]]

Jade waited the proper amount of time before climbing out of bed fresh from the throws of passion. Well it might have been actually enjoyable if the guy had known what he was doing. But she had learned early on when to fake it and when to enjoy it. There was a reason that man never received any loving from his wife and that she frequented Karkat with a zeal. 

She threw on a robe and dashed out of the lavish bedroom in search of her favorite new friend. She even made sure to pass by the kitchens to take her infusion. What kind of paid whore could she be if she was always pregnant? 

“Have you seen John?” She asked excitedly to the poor servant girl taking her empty glass. 

“No ma’am.” The girl muttered keeping her eyes turned to the floor. She giggled dashing away again. It was just like the regular staff to be surprised by her. She embraced the way of life. It was a good one and the Striders took care of their own. It wasn’t like she was parading through the foyer, she was keeping to the servant halls in her scant wear. 

She managed to find John without help when she went to check on Dave. The poor fellow was standing butt naked in Broderick’s office while the two bothers discussed finical things. She laughed at him for a moment. “Don’t sweat the small stuff Egbert. It’s all a part of training.” She remembered a similar situation years back. Naked head to toe while the brother and their father treated her like furniture. He should count himself lucky. His training wouldn’t be near as painful as hers had been. Things had gotten better when the Eldest Strider had passed way. Not all that much different, but certainly better. 

John gave a sniffle and a weak sob at her, but managed to crack a smile. He’d be just fine. 

Nepeta Leijon is a regular visitor. She’s taken a personal liking to Equius. And before you report me to the authorities for business with a minor, they know. She comes for tea time and play dates with Equius. Nothing illegal is happening. Unless you consider charging her roughly the cost of a sandwich to get Karkat dressed up as an Imperial Solider abuse of a minor. In which case, I’ll bury you myself. 

What about him? Eridan Ampora is second in line to the throne, a huge dick, but he pays. He hasn’t killed anyone, and hasn’t asked me to kill anyone that would be missed. So all and all, don’t put up with him unless there is money involved, or a commoner. Then he’ll make you put up with him.

Equius and Terezi are skilled in those kind of games. However, the charge is extra and any injuries- well you are required to sign a waiver. Bare in mind the safe words are lemonsnout and hoofbeast. Don’t ask why, because I never cared enough to want to know.

And by favorite I hope you mean the one that pays the most. Eridan is second bidder only to Kanaya. He makes sure to book Sollux at least once at week, no other regulars frequent as much as those two.